The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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