my best friend tried to rape me with a pineapple
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
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