yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
