Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
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