Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
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