Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
I'm too high and old for this...
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
