This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Randomize
