Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize