and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
Watching her eat just hurts me
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
Randomize
