so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Randomize