hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
Randomize
