Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
