worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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