then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
Randomize
