omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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