The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
