I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
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in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
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The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize