four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
I did not marry a roomba.
Randomize
