Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
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