he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
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