Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
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