Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
