i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
We named our party play list daddy issues
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
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