Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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Sorry TheJokerNelson hasn't picked any favorites yet.

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(508): View more from Massachusetts

you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.

(978): View more from Massachusetts

I guess I misjudged your gender.

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(714): View more from California

my room smells like sperm. sweet.

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(314): View more from Missouri

so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.

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(847): View more from Illinois

Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party

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(513): View more from Ohio

i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home

(419): View more from Ohio

move.

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(716): View more from New York

its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose

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(816): View more from Missouri

And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.

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(613): View more from Ontario

Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday

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(508): View more from Massachusetts

How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?

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