I am full of burrito and curiosity
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
