Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
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