Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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