how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
Randomize
