I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Randomize