She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
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