Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
Randomize
