That's intense
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize
