awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
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6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
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Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
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