Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
