in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
21 Porn Stars Confess What Sex Is Really Like On Set
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
did you just send me my own nude
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.