never play flip cup with pint glasses
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Dick very happy bro
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