your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Randomize
