Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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