I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
