You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
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