That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Randomize