no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
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