He disabled his match.com account in front of me
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
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