Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
You smell like stripper and shame
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Randomize
