If you die in college, do you die in real life?
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
Randomize
