oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Randomize
