He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
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