At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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