oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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