I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
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