their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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